Friendship

Author’s Note: Last week’s news was the Platte River is dry, bone dry in places. Hearing this grief gushes through my body, shakes me to my knees. Is the miracle of ample water a relic of the past? I remember when the Platte was alive, slurping water as it coursed through its winding banks. This writing celebrates when the river was full and the sanctity of friendship.

Photo of the Platte River by Mike Stinson

Five women, old friends, are ready for a lazy river ride under a beautiful blue sky, on a cumulus cloud-filled day. Our brightly colored kayaks—two green, blue, yellow and red—serve as transportation for the morning. With the help of a guide, our group pushes off, bobbing on the water like rubber duckies at a carnival booth. We are to travel five and one-half miles down the meandering Platte river, paddling our kayaks, breathing out the little disturbances and annoyances that float in our consciousness. I wonder if there is magic in deep friendship.

River Scene
Platte River unwinds before me like a sleeping woman. Soft curves and her iridescent brown skin sparkle and stretch long and mysterious. Along the shoreline, my eyes can’t take in all the countless shades of green. Hundred year old granddaddy cottonwoods frame the muddy water like dark green eyelashes that wink and blink in the soft wind. A few scattered leaves on the aging Black Walnut trees shimmer yellow and chartreuse in the bright sun. Clusters of forest green sumac seem to change colors flashing pink, readying themselves for the party reds of autumn.

Being on a river one becomes intensely aware of all that is around. The air has a fragrance to it, not sweet, but ancient smelling. Bur oaks in all stages of life send up an aroma of sap and wet leaves; dead trees with decaying bark release into the air something raw and unclean like unwashed vegetables. Fish parts lay scattered on the sand. A smoky blue-grey egret standing on a sandbar turns its face towards the sun. Soaring high on the soft wind currents, a lone eagle watches. We must look like ants to him.

Deep Friendship
These strong and adventurous women have had a long history with each other—some for over thirty years—traversing together over time the complexities of work, family and relationship. During this epic kayak journey, our tight bond reveals what it means to work united and join together in the wonders of sisterhood. Eudora Welty said literature, history and poetry are drawn to friendship as a subject “…to discover, perceive, learn from it the nature of ourselves, of humankind, the relationships we share in the world.”

It is said that friendship tests us and brings us to the edge. One went over baptizing her in Platte’s dark waters. She was there and then wasn’t vanishing like an act of Houdini. Her dark hair floats like seaweed before dipping under. A chorus of gasps. All in slow motion, we’re holding our breaths, was it a dare?

The  circles of water become smaller and smaller until one arm rises above the lid of the river like the hand of an old clock stuck on twelve. Bobbing around in our little ducks, we fish her out, the water closing softly behind. – Becky Breed

Exercise for Living Creatively:

  • Read “Happiness” by Raymond Carver.
  • Much has been written about the topic of friendship in literature. Consider how these special relationships are an important part of the storyline: Ann and Diane in Anne of Green Gables; Sherlock Holmes and John Watson in Sherlock Holmes; Huck and Jim in Adventures of Huckleberry Finn; and Athos, Porthos and Aramis in The Three Musketeers.
  • Make of a list of the friendships you have observed over the years. Or, make a list of individuals whether in storybook or in real life who form unlikely relationships. For example, recall the characters in Plainsong by Kent Haruf, the old bachelor farmers who befriend Victoria, a pregnant teenage girl.
  • Select a relationship you want to work with. Reflect upon the defining characteristics of the individuals in the relationship. In what ways do they support each other? What does it look like to be loyal and trustworthy? How can you convey belief in one another? What’s the bigger story or poem they are part of?
  • Now write or paint or sculpt conveying the strong bonds in the relationship. Let your art speak to you.

For more inspiration, check out our website www.thewritingandcreativelife.com.

Or follow this link to purchase Writing in Community or our latest book, The Fire Inside.

 

 

 

 

Wild Passions

Always I have loved gardens and gardening, but about 15 years ago after moving into a new house (new to me, anyway) and acquiring a yardful of plants and flowers, I suddenly became obsessed with all things relating to flowers–perennials, in particular. It became for me my wild passion. I checked out books from the library—Perennial All Stars and Perennial Combinations (two I remember), and pored through the pages. I loved everything about those books. I liked the pictures, of course, the descriptions of the various plants, and I especially liked their names.

There was the elegant Lady’s Mantle, the exotic Siberian Iris and Golden Hakone Grass. There was Purple Toadflax—what was that?  Silver Wormwood and Bear’s Breech? It was almost as if there were years and years of ancient lore underlying each plant, and I wanted to learn about them all. I indulged myself in those books, and then in as many plants as would thrive in the twenty by forty patch of soil under my care.

It’s wonderful when these “wild passions” make their appearances, making each day a little more exciting, each new encounter adding wonder and meaning and fulfillment to our lives. Of course there are romantic passions. And relationships with family and friends.  But if we are lucky, we will experience all sorts of grand passions. Like a passion for learning, for music, perhaps, or for gardening. The more we have, the better. I think that’s how we were meant to live: like children finding delight in each new thing, like lovers wild for what we love.

From time to time, I’ve had flings with crewel embroidery, ceramics, and macramé—remember macramé? Those passions came and went.  Others have been more enduring. I love the work of poet, Mary Oliver, and have bought every book of hers I could lay my hands on. The same with Linda Pastan, Kim Addonizio, and Dorrianne Laux. Also Joyce Sutphen. A new discovery for me is poet George Bilgere, and I highly recommend his book, The Good Kiss. And I greatly admire the novelists Alice Hoffman and Chris Bohjalian. There are many more, of course, and  more out there I haven’t discovered yet. The thought of that send chills down my spine!

And now we come to that other great love affair you might be experiencing—that with creativity, in whatever form it takes. “Passion is energy,” Oprah Winfrey said. “Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.” Let that passion burn. Embrace it, take that passion to a beautiful place, and make it yours forever. It’s a wonderful way to be alive.

What about you? What are some of your great passions?
–Lucy Adkins (Note: This appeared in a slightly different version in The Fire Inside by Lucy Adkins and Becky Breed)

 

Writing Exercise:

  1. Read the Poem “Night Fishing” by Peter Sears.
  2. Make a list of some of the human emotions/conditions…like loneliness, happiness, a feeling of self-satisfaction. You can think of more.
  3. Make a list of some of the activities you do…like fishing, mowing the lawn, making a pie, and so on.
  4. Choose one of the human emotions/conditions, and pair it with an activity.
  5. Write, beginning with a first line that makes a comparison between the human emotion or condition and the activity.

You might be surprised at what happens!

For more inspiration, check out our website www.thewritingandcreativelife.com.

Or follow this link to purchase Writing in Community or our latest book, The Fire Inside.

 

 

 

Particularities of the Ordinary

Particularities and Meaning
When I was thirteen, dad gave me a small garden plot to tend for a year. It was six feet by six feet, tilled to make plantings easier. This fertile plot of earth received my attention for a year and before long, a window of wonder appeared. I started to notice details in the garden – a small city of vermin burrowing and crawling on their knees and fliers with tiny helicopter blades buzzing the grass.

At a young age I loved poetry and thought what’s important was looking for the extraordinary and exceptional. But “noticing” particularities of the ordinary made life feel bigger, more significant. Noticing the everyday brought up memories and meaningful connections sometimes from experiences years ago or, maybe a few minutes that wouldn’t have been accessed without paying attention.

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Living Among the Glories

We are what we eat, the old saying goes, and this is true, in that what we feed our bodies affects who we become as physical beings. Similarly, who we become spiritually and emotionally is influenced by what we feed our souls. As does nature.

As a people, we evolved living in nature. We wandered the plains, tended plants and animals that shared the world with us, woke to majestic sunrises and watched in awe as the heavenly bodies crossed the skies. How did this all come to pass, we wondered. We flourished, breathing deep of the rhythms of the earth.

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And I listened

I had to be four or five when I first heard the golden rule  “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  These words uttered by my mother when my sister and I accidentally tied my brother to a tree (mainly my sister). My mother’s use of the rule, I believe, was to appropriately socialize the two of us. Yet, even at that tender age, I knew we couldn’t just stand by when he, my brother, scared, teased, and, generally, irritated us most of the time. WE were the victims as my older sister tried to explain. But, later, Grandmother McKenney disagreed. And I listened.

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Your Wild and Precious Life

Your Wild and Precious Life

“Tell me,” Mary Oliver wrote, “what is it you intend to do with your wild and precious life?” What a wonderful question! And one we answer every day with every decision we make. Every action we take. And now that it is spring, the time of new beginnings, it’s a good question to ask again.

As children, we make discovery after discovery; every day brings something new; and we learn, we delight, we find joy in one wonderful new experience after another.  As we grow older, the pace of discovery slows down, but we still have many opportunities to make new and exciting finds, and open up our lives.

Perhaps some spring, we decide to plant a few flowers, and suddenly find ourselves intrigued with the world of gardening, plotting grand new schemes of beauty for the back yard.

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Magic of Awe Inspires Creativity

“My mother loved butterflies. After her celebration of life, a Monarch was fluttering around the exit door. She followed me to my car. Later, I wrote a poem about my mother migrating south with Monarchs. Glorious” – Becky Breed

If someone asks “What makes a good life?” Would you say friends and family you can count on? A spiritual connection? Personal resources that make you happy? Dacher Keltner, author of “The Thrilling New Science of Awe,” replied, “Find awe.” In his many years of research, he found that an awe-inspired life gives us meaning, and helps uncover something larger than ourselves–intense joy and  a sense of mystery that transcend common life. For artists and writers, there’s more. The magic of awe inspires creativity, creating a sense of wonder and deep curiosity–profound satisfaction and meaning.

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Writing From the White-Hot Center

Writing From the White-Hot Center

This last year I discovered a new writer that I love, the novelist, Lily King. In an essay in the back of one her novels, she tells about doing a reading at an Ivy League college in which, during the Q and A afterwards, she was asked “what factors determine your authorial distance from the narrator?” She responded that “I don’t think when I write. I am like a blind worm on the ground.”  I love that! “A blind worm on the ground.”

She goes on to relate how she loves English literature classes and has been an English teacher herself. How she’s discussed and taken great interest in English-teachery things such as themes and yes, authorial distance. But that when she writes, she doesn’t use her “English teacher brain.” Not in the first draft of writing, “What you need,” she writes, “all you need, is your creative, sensual, wide-open brain.”

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Gifts of Creativity: More Good Follows

“The spirit of an artist’s gifts can wake your own.” – Lewis Hyde

Give Freely
“Anything you do not give freely and abundantly becomes lost to you,” remarks Annie Dillard in her book “Give It All, Give It Now.” She shares her view about the writing and creative life by describing the grand generosity and great courage giving asks of us: to give, to share, to offer what we can to the world. Dillard said when gifts of creativity are offered, “…something more will arise for later, something better.”…and more good follows.

Creating what rings true requires us to pay enormous attention to the world. For many, it is our love and destiny to create–our romance with possibility and the unwritten promise to imagine more. Barb, an artist, saw beauty in her garden and captured it in dazzling watercolor. She painted me a set of beautiful notecards of pink petunias with bright lime green stems. Afterwards, a friend was experiencing a loss and I sent her a flowered notecard with a few lines of poetry. Giving changes us.

Want the world better
Sharing our creativity shows we care about the world and want it better. When Anne Frank picked up her pen to write, although just a little girl, she was possessed of great insight and courage. She had the power to enter the minds and hearts of others bringing about deeper understanding, wider love. It’s true, an act of creation can have a rippling effect. Consider son-in-law Chris who created a magnificent red and white mosaic birdhouse featuring Charlie Parker, a brilliant black saxophonist whose life was cut short. His gift to the world brought new significance to the musician and by donating his creation raised money supporting a burned mountain top in Colorado.

More Good Follows
Ask yourself, the next time you sit down to create, what do you find yourself being pulled toward? Perhaps you want to write poetry about unrequited love, the search for inner peace or the struggle to find meaning and purpose in your existence. Photograph the beauty and finality in nature–or paint an unforgettable purple sunrise. Whatever your gifts are, cultivate imaginative compassion and notice how more good follows. You can begin today. As Anne Franke reminds, “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” Your life and others will be richer for it.  – Becky

Writing/Creativity Exercise:

  1. Re-read the glorified words of Francis of Assisi, “For it is in the giving that we receive.” To begin, reflect on the many ways you can offer gifts of creativity to others. Recognize and celebrate your talents.
  2. Now select the ways you want to share and light up someone’s life. Your time, talent and creativity can make a difference. Consider:
    1. Interviewing an older relative or neighbor and writing one of his stories.
    2. Painting a small canvas of a colleague’s dog or the big fish she caught.
    3. Photographing a beautiful sunset and giving to someone you love.
    4. Listening and encouraging a friend who is struggling.
    5. Other ways to give: offering your talent of organization, playing the piano or singing to a shut in, baking and decorating someone’s favorite holiday cookies. The opportunities to give are endless.

 

For more inspiration, check out our website www.thewritingandcreativelife.com.

Or follow this link to purchase our latest book, The Fire Inside.

Postscript;

“May you be surrounded by friends and family, and if this is not your lot, may the blessings find you in your solitude.” – Leonard Cohen

During this special season, sharing our love and friendship might be the best gifts.

Here’s to the good that you find and the great that awaits.

Warmest Wishes,

Becky

 

Gerald Stern and The One Thing in Life

A month ago, I learned about the death at age 97 of poet Gerald Stern. I knew only a handful of his poems: “The Dancing,” “Waving Goodbye,” and “Stepping Out of Poetry,” but I loved those poems. They got me in the stomach, punched me with their emotion. And hearing of his passing, I knew that I needed to read more of his work. These last few weeks that is what I have been doing.

I read again “Stepping Out of Poetry” in which he reminisces about getting on “the old yellow streetcar” and going to the public library, the joy he found there: “What would you give,” he asks, “for your dream/  to be as clean and simple as it was then/ in the dark afternoons, at the old scarred tables?”

I found and read “Waving Goodbye,” about sending his daughter off to the next stage of her life, experiencing her loss “as an animal would, pressing my forehead against her/ walking in circles, moaning, touching her cheek…”

Then there is “The One Thing in Life,” a poem he considered as one which best described him and his life in poetry. Here are the last five lines:

There is a sweetness buried in my mind;
there is water with a small cave behind it;
there’s a mouth speaking Greek.
It is what I keep to myself; what I return to;
the one thing that no one else wanted.

How lucky he was to recognize that buried sweetness, to explore that small cave. How lucky for us to be able to read his poetry. And wonder about the wonderful one thing in life which exists for each of us.  –Lucy Adkins

Writing Exercise:

  1. Read “Waving Goodbye” and “Stepping Out of Poetry”
  2. Think about some people or ways of life you have said goodbye to. Jot down a few.
  3. Think about some fond remembrances of the past and list some of these.
  4. Write, beginning with the phrase “What would I give……..” Go on from there and see what happens.

For more inspiration, check out our website www.thewritingandcreativelife.com.Or follow this link to purchase our latest book, The Fire Inside.

 

 

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