King of the Mountain

“A person’s identity is like a pattern drawn on a tightly stretched parchment. Touch one part of it, just one allegiance, and the whole person will react, the whole drum will sound.” – Amin Maalouf

Fred’s family was on a different scale than most families. He had seven brothers and one sister, and all the brothers slept in one small bedroom. Growing up poor, Fred said they banked on their creativity for fun since they had few material resources and money for games and toys. Their bedroom became the playground. Fred didn’t have the name for it then as he watched his siblings play — creative identity– but he said Cynthia Heimel was right: “There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth.” And Fred figured out which was true for his brothers.

Fred described how play helped him learn a lot about his siblings and life by discovering how important it is to adapt and change. He learned that ingenuity can be a tool to gain an edge, observed his brothers’ problem solving and whether it translated into victory on the battle field, and, for some, the benefit of originality  in finding the best hiding places. Fred said he employed all this knowledge to his advantage. You see, even though Fred was not the oldest, he learned how to be king of the mountain.

Most of us didn’t experience an elephant-sized family, but whoever constituted family for you, personal identity continues to be refined by the bumping of relationships within it, and in those new relationships acquired as you mature. Like the forces in forging steel, the people we connect with have the potential of shaping our lives. Their impact carrying emotional, spiritual and creative influences. Christine Serve defines personal identity broadly as “the concept you develop about yourself that evolves over the course of your life.” And that broad concept of personal identity reveals, ultimately, what you think about yourself as a creative being.

Through the nature of living, we are continually cast back into experiences, akin to those childhood interactions, that formed us. For some individuals, it’s like being on a movie reel that keeps looping around playing out the same dynamics again and again. Think about it, as children we experienced fear, adventure, challenge, sadness, and joy. How did you respond in those situations?  Were you innovative or predictable in your behavior?  As adults, has much changed? Are you still reacting in much the same ways you did in your youth? (Will I always be the sensitive one in the family?)

It’s true, our personal identities are revealed through play and other creative ways we express ourselves—then and now. Were we folks who hung back, dove in, waited for others, took a risk, popped the idea, listened carefully, pooped out? Did they call us the “last man in,” ever-ready bunny, poor me, dictator, made it work, kept at it, crybaby? Once we put a label on someone, it sticks, and as Maya Angelou described, “that’s the end of it.”

Creative play puts us in the game, our game. We can change the rules only when we recognize we’re in charge. And we get to decide at any age to play differently. How do you express your identity as a creative being? A great sand pile is still out there, do you want to be king of the mountain again? – Becky

Exercise for Living Creatively:

1. What were the creative aspects of your identity as a child?
2. How are they the same or different from your creative identity as an adult?
3. Anything you want to add or revise to be king of the mountain again?